Accidents
will occur in the best regulated families.
CHARLES
DICKENS – David Copperfield
“… dare
to humiliate your mother and me!”
“You did
that all by yourself, Papa. Nobody else cared!”
“Don’t
you be fresh with me, Andromeda! You are disrespectful!”
“I’m not
disrespectful! You’re behaving like some medieval monk, that’s all!”
“Andy!”
Narcissa groaned, shooting her sister an imploring glance and finally managing
to free her arm from her mother’s claws.
“Shut up,
Cissy!”
“Engaging
yourself to a Muggleborn! Have you no
pride at all!” their father shouted on top of his voice.
“Oh, I’m
extremely proud, actually!” Andromeda’s yelled back in the same vein; her eyes
gleamed dangerously. “I’m proud to be the fiancée of such a clever, talented,
kind wizard!”
“Clever?!
I thought he’s a Hufflepuff?” Cygnus snorted with disdain. She jerked up her
hand, flashing her plain ring right in her father’s face, who pushed it away
and spit, “Disgrace! Outrageous disgrace! Desecration! One thousand three
hundred years of –”
“Oh, cut
it out, Papa! I don’t give a damn about your sacrosanct dynasty shit, you hear me?!”
Narcissa
groaned once more. “Andy! In Merlin’s name, tone it down!”
“You shut up, Cissy! You keep your prissy mouth right shut! Going out with the greatest
jerk to walk this earth, you have no
place to talk!”
Amandine
Black merely whimpered, fiercely shaking her head. Narcissa laughed derisively.
“I accompanied someone to some ball!
I don’t see any engagement rings on my
hand, likely enough because I still have my five senses together!”
Cygnus
whirled around and pointed at her. “And that’s
another thing we will talk about in due time! How could you, Narcissa! How could you agree to go out with that boy of all persons! Have you no shame!”
Before
Narcissa could reply, dumbfounded as she was in that second, Andy had given a
raucous laughter. “But why! Isn’t that what you’re all about, Papa? I thought a
Black girl couldn’t do any better than get off with two thousand years of
pureblood inbreeding! You ought to be so proud with her choice!”
“I’m not getting off with him! I – we’re just
friends, that’s all!”
“Friends!” Cygnus made it sound as if
she’d used a profanity. “Is that how they call that these days?!”
“No,
Papa, you – I’m sorry, but you’re mistaken! There is nothing between him and me
I’d have to be ashamed of, I –”
“You
ought to be ashamed to be seen with such a man in public, child!” he thundered.
She had never seen him look at her like this.
“But –”
“Don’t
you know what people will say of you? What they must think?!”
“There
you go,” Andromeda inserted, half smug, half furious.
Their
father didn’t even look at her, yelling, “You keep your mouth shut, Andromeda!
Are all of my daughters completely out of their heads?! Bellatrix getting off
with this ridiculous buffoon Lestrange, my little flower – who could have made
her pick among every decent young man
in the entire wizarding world – chooses to humiliate herself and me, her
father, by associating herself with the most irresponsible, debauched Lothario
she could find, and you –” He stabbed his finger at Andromeda. “You top it all by throwing yourself into
the arms of a Hufflepuff, and if that
wasn’t enough, a Mudblood –”
Amandine
winced back and cried, “Cygnus, tranquillise-toi!*”
“No, I
will not!” Cygnus barked and returned
to glare at Andromeda. “Your suitor
is even more inappropriate than her
companion, and what does my wayward daughter do? Engage herself to marry him!
Ha! How silly can you be, Andromeda! How blind! Of course he wants to marry you! He is nothing, he’s got nothing!
Couldn’t do any better than catch a Black, could he? But not with me, Missy,
not with my money!”
Amandine
put her hand on her husband’s arm. “Chéri –”
“Neminem
pecunia divitem fecit! Non bene pro toto libertas venditur auro!*” Andromeda wore a triumphant
expression.
Cygnus
sneered and countered in the same coin. “Si qua voles apte nubere, nube pari!*”
“Nescit
amor priscis cedere imaginibus. Nec tibi nobilitas poterit succurrere amanti!*”
Cygnus
snorted, addressing his wife, “Can you believe the nerve of this girl? Such
sheer stupidity?! He’s out to get her goddamned dowry, but she delights to call
it ‘love’!”
“Cygnus!”
Amandine minded strong language, even in a moment like this, which was funny,
Narcissa found, because the French had the world’s best assortment of swear
words, as far as she could tell. In this situation though, she had no mind to
mull over manners. She felt sorry for her parents, just as for Andromeda,
although in the case of the latter, she also strongly disapproved of her
behaviour towards their parents.
“Money,
that’s all you can think of,” Andromeda hissed. “Is it so hard to believe that
a guy should care for me, as a
person?! That someone could want to marry me without thinking of money, or
family lines, or the rest of this crap?!”
“Oh,
you’re pretty enough to be sure, silly as a chicken, but pretty! That’s a nice
bonus for such a fortune seeker, getting himself a pretty, stupid broad that’s
loaded with gold! But mark my words, daughter, he isn’t going to see a single Knut
of my money!”
“You can
keep your money, old man!”
He
giggled hysterically, waved his hand and whirled around once more, pointing at
Narcissa now and glaring. “And you,
young Miss! I’m particularly disappointed with you, Narcissa! Light of my eyes, and you deceive me! You’ve been in
the secret! You’ve been in league with them! It would have been your filial duty
to inform your parents about this utter disgrace!”
Before
Narcissa could think of an answer, Andromeda cried out in contempt, “Has your
little spy failed you? Your little darling, eh? Dear, dear Cissy, always so
good, always so obedient!”
Narcissa
couldn’t believe her own ears. She had kept her silence to do her sister a
favour, and this was her reward?! “That’s rich, Andy! I thought it was up to you to tell them!”
“Associates
in crime!” Cygnus shrieked. “My own daughters betray me!”
“Get off
it! Nobody has betrayed you!”
“Tainting
my dearest girl, Andromeda! Are you proud of yourself?”
“Exceedingly!
I hadn’t believed your dearest girl could possess something like a
backbone!”
“Hey!”
Spit flew
from Cygnus’ lips as he ranted on, “My little girl would never have gotten
involved with such a – such a – scoundrel
if it hadn’t been for your bad influence on her!”
“I warned her against the jerk!”
“Lip
services! It’s rotten mores that taint the innocent!”
“Cygnus,
Andromeda,” Mrs Black tried once more, clasping her handkerchief before her
breast. “We can sort zis out, entendez! I ‘ave a suggestion to make. We will –
‘ow do you say – put zis on ice, eh? Zis ‘ole engagement. Andromeda will start
‘er college in September like planned –”
“College?
She’s too naff for that, obviously!”
They kept
on screaming and insulting each other; more and more, Narcissa believed that
this must be a nightmare. It couldn’t be real. It mustn’t be real. Both her father and Andromeda kept on attacking
each other as well as Narcissa, who found it increasingly difficult to keep her
composure. She understood that they were very upset, but she saw no
justification for putting the blame on her,
to let off steam at her expense, and she was scandalised with both of them.
Poor
Amandine tried to soothe all parties, but except for Narcissa, no one seemed to
hear her. Those two had taken each other’s hands and squeezed them for comfort,
and after more than two hours, Amandine seized her chance when both combatants
made a quick break to get some air, and proposed a compromise. Andromeda was
supposed to refrain from seeing her fiancé for one year, to find out whether
their feelings for each other would last and stand up to that test. In return,
her parents would promise to accept her decision after that period, whatever it
would be.
Narcissa
felt a rush of relief – this was the first sensible idea since they had entered
the house; Cygnus stared at his wife in speechless incredulity. Andromeda
faltered, her scarlet cheeks turning paper white, and she briefly looked to the
floor. “No, Maman. That won’t be possible.”
“But why?” Narcissa and Amandine cried
simultaneously.
Andromeda
had one hand on her temple and one on her tummy, gave a groan and murmured, “I
cannot not see Ted for so long. And
trust me, you don’t want me to either.”
“Now
she’s finally lost her last bit of sanity,” Cygnus snapped. “Your mother offers
you a unique chance for reconciliation, and you decline?! You expect us to
believe that this was more than just some petty puppy love and then you –”
“I will
marry Ted as soon as possible. I must. You wouldn’t want it any other way.” She
raised her gaze to rest on her mother, took a deep breath and went on, “A new
son-in-law isn’t the only thing you’ll get, Maman. You’ll also be a
grandmother.”
For a
whole minute, there was deep silence. Cygnus opened and shut his mouth but no
sound would come, his wife had clasped her throat and choked in shock, and
Narcissa… Narcissa had closed her eyes, processing the news more speedily than
their parents and seeing all the awful consequences in merciless clarity.
Andromeda was pregnant – it couldn’t have come any worse. In this moment, it
wasn’t even so important anymore that the child’s father was no pureblood. She
had violated the number one unspoken rule. Her father would never accept any man who had been caught meddling with one of his daughters
before a ring – a wedding ring! – was
on her finger. Sure, Bellatrix had had her share of fun before getting married,
too, but she had been clever enough to conceal that from their parents. Nisi
caste, saltem caute!* And Amandine was a devout Catholic,
did that need any further explanation?
Andy had
undermined the little chance she had had to prompt their parents to accept Ted
Tonks. It was all over. Their father would never forgive either of them, she
would be cast out of the family with all consequences, no money, no
acknowledgement of either husband or child….
She
looked over to her sister, who clearly expected some sign of sympathy, but Narcissa could merely shake her head. Oh
Andy…. She was unspeakably sad; she didn’t want to lose Andy – her favourite
sister – the only person in the world that came close to a real confidante. As
if all this wasn’t tragic enough, the pendulum of their bad luck swung back to
strike with full force – Amandine collapsed with a last, meek whimper and fell
to the floor.
Everything
after that horrible second seemed to be in a haze; Narcissa could hardly recall
mere fractions of this night after her mother’s seizure. She had screamed and
her father had screamed – some servant had been sent to fetch a Healer – half a
dozen of them had fussed over Amandine trying to revive her. At some point,
after Healer Smethwyk had announced that Amandine had sustained a cardiac arrest
but would probably survive; Narcissa had seen Andy drag two bags along the
hallway, she had stopped, embraced her little sister and said goodbye.
“Don’t
go, Andy! We can sort this out, we can –”
“It’s
over, Cissy. You know that as well as I. I’ve got to do what I’ve got to do.
I’m sorry that I’ve ruined your chances for ever going out again, but seeing
with whom you’d be meddling, I daresay
you ought to thank me in the long run. Tell Maman I love her. And send me an
owl how she’s doing. We’ll keep in touch.”
Narcissa
cried mutely, not noticing the tears. The fear for her mother’s life – the
shock of Andy’s pregnancy – the pain of seeing her walk out the door, knowing
she would never set her foot again in this house – and not least her father’s
voiceless wrath. He was heartily attached to his wife and children, suffering
as much as everyone else, and unluckily, Narcissa was the only one left to vent
his anger and despair on.
Never
before had he been furious with her, not even disappointed. She had always been
his darling child, and she had no clue how to deal with this unprecedented
outrage. If only he had shouted at her! But still, he wouldn’t raise his voice
when addressing his ‘little flower’, as he had always called her until this
night. His reproaches were bitter and cynical, he hissed at her, full of
contempt and deepest disappointment, putting the full amount of blame on her.
She could have prevented all this. If she had told them as she ought to have,
about Andromeda’s unsuitable suitor, they would have taken the proper measures
to stop that unholy affair, and Andromeda would not have gotten pregnant, and
ultimately, their mother wouldn’t lie on her sickbed now, paper-white and
half-dead…
In her head, she knew that none of this was her fault, but the frights of the night,
her father’s coldness and all the rest made her feel so nauseated that she
couldn’t grasp a rational thought. The sun had long risen before she was
eventually sent to her room, with the clear announcement that she wasn’t to
leave it again until the end of the holidays, not for meals, not for the piano,
and certainly not for sheer entertainment either. She didn’t care. The only
thing that mattered now was that her mother would be well again; she’d gladly
stay in this room for the rest of her entire life, if she could only undo this
previous night, if her mother would walk in now, rosy and lively and serene as
ever, if Andy came back and told them it had all been nothing but a terrible
joke…
By happenstance,
she spotted her reflection in the mirror, sneering contemptuously. Fourteen
hours earlier, she had enthused about some silly dress robes, had been happy
with trifles like her hairdo, had taken pleasure in going out with a notorious
scoundrel to flatter her own vanity. She was every bit as silly as those stupid
girls she always scorned, just as superficial, just as mindless!
The first
to go was the silly little nosegay; she ripped it off her dress and hurled it
on the floor. Then she undressed, throwing the precious silk garments into the
fireplace, and set them on fire with her wand. Then she lay down on her bed,
stared at the ceiling and willed herself to sleep, which, of course, wasn’t
successful. Her mind was racing over the same issues, over and over again, and
the next time she looked at the clock, it was already past nine o’clock. She
got up again and rang for a servant, wanting to hear how her mother was.
“Miss
Narcissa,” the elf squeaked unhappily. “My good Miss Narcissa, Elsy is so, so
sorry!”
“Skip
that part and tell me about my mother, Elsy!”
“The
Mistress isn’t well, Miss Narcissa. Oh! Oh!
Not at all well!”
Amandine
had been treated with sedatives and was still sleeping, bless her. Declining to
be brought a breakfast tray, Narcissa locked herself in again, dully staring
out of the window, but without seeing the garden, or anything in it. She didn’t
know how long she had been sitting there, when she was disturbed in her misery.
Elsy had knocked, announcing a visitor.
* Calm yourself!
* Money has never made anyone rich. All the world’s gold does not
offset liberty.
* If you want to marry happily, choose a
man equalling you!
* Love won’t be governed by the portraits of the ancestors. If you’re in love, your noble background won’t help you!
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