I.15. – An Invitation to Dance

Coyness is nice, and coyness can stop you from saying all the things in life you’d like to... So, if there’s something you’d like to try... If there’s something you’d like to try – ASK ME – I won’t say “no” – how could I? – Ask me, ask me, ask me!

THE SMITHS

Narcissa was sitting in the library, brooding over her preparations for her upcoming OWL exams, when she suddenly thought she had perceived a faint scrap of music, and automatically, she looked up and around, but there was nothing to be seen. Of course. She must have been distracted. She returned to read, but there it was again, a little more distinct this time. She gazed around, but couldn’t locate the origin, so she assumed that some student down in the castle must have turned on their music box really loud. That would have been a sufficient explanation, but in that moment, she spotted a book on the shelf right in front of her, which was jiggling. She rubbed her eyes and looked again, but no – this was no fata morgana – that book was jiggling, quite in pace with the music that grew louder and louder, until the book fell off the shelf, just that it didn’t fall – it took off gracefully to float in mid-air, opening and – no way – starting to rustle to the beat, as if it was dancing. And it wasn’t only this one book. More and more books did the same, jiggling, rustling, wiggling – hovering and dancing along to the waltz that rang loudly through the galleries by now.

She didn’t believe this, honestly, and her jaw finally dropped when she saw the statue of Barnabas the Barmy scuttle along, tap-dancing, right before her eyes. She peeked around, finding that thousands and tens of thousands of books were dancing everywhere now, and somewhere in the distance, Madam Pince was going berserk, trying to chase them, shouting, but incapable of drowning out the beautiful song. Barnabas had unravelled a few yards of his bronze bandages and did a fancy ballet impression using them as ribbons, finally turning to Narcissa with a deep bow and an outstretched hand, as if asking her to dance with him. She chuckled, shaking her head, and the statue continued to dance by himself. The ridiculousness of his performance mingled with the utter beauty and elegance of the book ballet; Narcissa pressed a hand to her mouth to keep herself from bursting out laughing, gazing around to see who had brought this about. She thought she knew the perpetrator just too well, but she saw nobody except the frenzied librarian.

She finally learnt the truth over supper when Bertram asked with a wide grin, “Did you hear about that library incident, Cissa?”

“I happened to be sitting right in the middle, thank you very much.”

“In the middle, uh? Well, you needn’t thank me, that’s for sure!”

“Sure thing, Higgs. I wouldn’t have suspected you of being so imaginative either.”

Lucius put on his best grin, too. “Imaginative, you say?”

“The choreography was elegant and the tap-dancing statue added a refreshing sprinkle of humour. The one responsible must have considerable taste –”

He was beaming, literally. “You think so?”

“– and hardly an ounce of brains to spare,” she finished dryly.

He licked his bottom lip and scrutinised her with a strange glance. “And why would that be?”

“Because Madam Pince got old McGonagall, and she’s bound to sniff them out, and boy, they’ll be in trouble!”

“But what would life be without a spot of trouble?”

“Oh well… Imagine you’re a student who’s – let’s say for the sake of the example – who’s about to graduate in less than five weeks, and all of a sudden, boom, you’re no longer allowed to enter the library, because you’ve pulled an – undeniably admirable – stunt in there. Doing the math, it’s not worth it.”

“I’d say it depends.”

“Would you?”

“Oh, I would, yes. Let’s say your exemplary student never sets foot in the library anyway. However, that student does take great delight in seeing a gorgeous girl making pretty faces with pleasure at a good stunt. For this sort of student it’d be totally worth it.”

“See? That’s why McGonagall will have such a walk in the park tackling the culprit. There aren’t that many graduating students who never go into the library.”

“Could be a younger student, too.”

“How many Sixth Years or younger attend this school who’d even be capable of performing such a piece of magic?”

“I’d know at least two.”

“Oh yes?”

“You for one are a Fifth Year, and little Severus here is a Second Year, but I’m sure he could do it.”

She shot the boy in question a smile and winked at him. “No offence, Severus, you know how fond I am of you. But there’s no way you could levitate thirty thousand books and conduct them to An der schönen blauen Donau just yet.” She returned to smirk condescendingly at Lucius again. “What’s more – both Severus and I have ample respect for books, and libraries, and would never do something like that only to – well, what did you say was the reward?”

He gave her a very intense look. “Seeing an incredibly gorgeous girl look even more stunning because she finds her favourite things in the world do a little dance for her alone.”

His silvery eyes were piercing her, making her feel slightly dizzy, but she wouldn’t let it show. At least that’s what she strove for, so she cried decidedly saucy, “Aha! Favourite things in the world, you say… That narrows the circle of suspects exceedingly. Now we only need to find that girl who’s got a thing for Barnabas the Barmy, and the lad who wants to get off with her. Should be easy enough.”

“Yeah, Barnabas gave it a nice touch, didn’t he? Gee, I’d say that’s a hell of a way to be invited to the big graduation ball!”

“You think that’s what it was? A subtle invitation to go to a dance?”

“Subtle? I don’t know. I’m no expert at subtlety, as you keep on assuring me…”

“If I said so, I must have been right, I assume. I always am.”

Gibbon started to giggle hysterically. “Do us all a favour and get a room, you two, pu-leeeaase!”

“Don’t look at me, buddy, she’s the snag to this scheme,” Lucius said smartly, smiling at Narcissa.

“Snag or snack, Luce?”

“Both unfortunately. Come on, Cissa, you see the audience’s expectations! We mustn’t let them down. Let’s get through with it.” He winked at her. “We can go to my place, all my dorm mates will be here for the next half an hour.”

Narcissa raised her eyes to the ceiling, exasperated. “Half an hour isn’t enough time, Malfoy.”

Howls and cheers all around, and Lucius put on his smuggest mien. “At last! Finally you see reason, and it’s about time!”

“I can see reason all right, and without glasses, pal. But can you?”

He disregarded the taunting tone and went on as impertinent as before, “Don’t you worry, honey, they’ll stay away all night and sleep in the Common Room if I tell them to!”

“I second that,” Bertram rejoiced.

Narcissa sneered at him. “Why, that’s so sweet of you guys, because I’d like to give your friend some sound curses, and it’d be such a shame if you got back early and relieved him.”

“You think you could take me on, Narcissa?”

“I’m a hundred percent sure that this is far more likely than you taking me, Malfoy.”

“Whoo-hoo, Black! Embarked on the train of dirty thoughts at last!” Bertram cackled.

Narcissa ignored him and kept on glowering at Lucius instead. “Get up, Malfoy, and let’s give it a try. Whoever’s quicker will receive a real treat tonight!”

He watched her closely, hesitating. “You haven’t guarded your virginity for so long to gamble it away like this!”

She got up and sneered. “I’m not gambling, coward. I know I’ll take you down in a heartbeat.” She marched off and out, wondering if he’d dare to come, and indeed, he had caught up with her by the time she walked out of the Great Hall.

“You’re serious, Narcissa?”

“Of course I am serious. I’ll hex you like you’ve never been hexed before.”

“Can we just exchange a consonant there?”

She ignored the comment, but couldn’t suppress a grin. “And the best is – I cannot lose.”

“You cannot?”

“In addition to the fact that I’m quicker than you, you wouldn’t do anything to me anyway, even if you did manage to stun me by shooting me in the back.”

“Are you crazy? Dear girl, I’ve wanted to hook up with you for ages. You cannot expect reserve from my side!”

“No, as a matter of fact I can and I do, because one of your most prominent flaws is your vanity. You are far too vain to take advantage of a girl who couldn’t defend herself. You want them yearning for you.”

“But you are yearning for me, Cissa.”

He winked at her and she battered with her lashes. “Oh, absolutely. Each and every night – in your dreams!”

“So you’re basically telling me that there is absolutely nothing for me to win in this? And for that I’ve skipped my kidney pie?” He pretended to be scandalised, making her laugh despite herself.

“Some kidney pie won’t be the only thing you’re missing once we’re through, Malfoy. I daresay you’ll mourn the loss of your self-respect so much more sorely. Well, everyone’s got to get what they deserve eventually.”

“But that’s what I’m saying all along, Cissa! So I’ll eventually get you as well!”

“But you don’t deserve me.”

“True. There’s not a chap in the world who’d be worthy enough for you.” For a moment, he became alarmingly serious, before returning to his familiar playfulness. “But among all these undeserving suitors, I do think I deserve a first place for sheer perseverance.”

She shook her head in mock exasperation. “Let’s talk about that perseverance, Malfoy, shall we? As I recall it, we once upon a time came to an understanding.”

“Did we?” He made wide eyes. “Isn’t that some old-fashioned euphemism when a couple sort of got engaged in the old times? Well, I must say I’m delighted you start seeing things the way I do, after all!”

“We made a deal, Malfoy. I spared your Quidditch career then, and you in turn promised to stop pestering me.”

“Come on, Cissa, I went back on that alleged promise a thousand times since then!”

“Precisely.”

“Which means I acquired a customary right by adverse practice.”

She chortled in genuine amusement. “Say what you will, your father is right. You will make a splendid Law Wizard!”

He pretended to wince as if she had struck him. “Ouch. That was a low shot, Cissa!”

“You’re not the only one not playing fair.”

“What can I say? Never trust a Slytherin.”

“Oh, indeed. Don’t you forget I am one myself. I do stick to my word though. How I wish I could be privy to your attempts explaining to your pals how you got beaten by a girl.”

“I hate being the one to put an end to your delusions, dearest, but alas! Someone’s got to do it, I suppose.”

“Would you wager on that?”

“Is that a question? You bet I would! I wager I’ll win fair and square, and if I do, you’ll come to my graduation ball with me!”

“Fine. But if I’m the one winning, you’ll have to ask out Perpetua Parkin.”

“The mind boggles with the mere possibility.”

“You admit there is a possibility, eh?” She shook her head mockingly. “That’s a start. So do we have a deal or not?”

“Of course we have.”

They had crossed the Slytherin Common Room and the corridor leading to his room. He took his time to shut the dorm door and put a spell on it, then very slowly turned around, his wand pointing at the floor.

“So what are you waiting for, Malfoy?”

“You don’t seriously want to duel with me now.”

“I most certainly do. Because once I’ve cursed you, you might kindly abandon your childish habit of filthy innuendoes in front of your buddies. Since we were speaking of ‘worth it’!”

“But I don’t want to curse you! You – you’re a girl!”

“Allow me to quote good Horatio – pu-leeeaase!”

“Seriously, Narcissa, not only you’re a girl, but The girl and I –”

“Spare your breath for your spell work. Come on – Incarcerous!”

She caught him slightly off-guard, so he jumped sideways, ducked behind Graham’s bed and repaid her in coin. “Confundo!”

She easily blocked the spell and deflected it towards its originator who ducked just in time, seeing it ricocheting before dissolving in thin air, destroying some of Graham’s most prized possessions along the way. “Blimey,” he coughed. “Where the hell did you learn that?!”

“I believe you chanced to meet my eldest sister, no?” she retorted languidly, pointing her wand straight at his head. “You don’t know what duelling is before you haven’t been chased twice around the whole house by her.”

“Why on earth would she do that?”

“For my cheek,” Narcissa replied complacently, stepping closer and lifting her wand for the final shot. He seized the opportunity to cast a non-verbal stunner at her but once again, she lazily evaded the curse with a little flicker of her wand and retaliated cleverly by aiming at a bookshelf over the spot where Lucius was cowering. Naturally, Graham stored no books there, so a framed poster of the Hackney Harriers fell down and hit him over the head. He muttered some swear words, crawled around the corner, managed a successful leg-lock curse that sent her to the floor, but he triumphed too early and was squarely hit by her following Full Body-Bind Curse.

She removed the Leg-Lock and got to her feet. “That was too easy, really. Bella’d never have held back like this.” She approached him, towering high above him. “I told you I’d get you, honey. Have a good time down there, contemplating your mischievous ways… Oh, I have something else for you to contemplate – you remember the exemplary student we were discussing? The one with the crush on the Barnabas aficionado? I think he could have succeeded with his invitation, if he stopped being a complete prat around the girl in question. Yes, I believe she would have agreed to accompany him to that ball… Nighty night, Lucius!”

*****

Useful Links: previous chapter, next chapter, Dramatis Personae